Three Questions Parent Leaders Need To Ask
If you have read some of our previous posts you know that I am a big fan of questions. I believe it is our questions that determine our reality so it is of the greatest importance that we are asking the right ones. Great leaders ask great questions because they know that the questions we ask lead to great conversations that bring about growth and change. These conversations can be with others in our family or internal conversations that lead to steps to becoming a better leader and person. Here are three great questions to ask about your parentship (Parent Leadership) and your family.
How can we do this better?
Think of all the different activities you have going on in your home. These can be things like, what time you get up in the morning, what you do to get the kids out the door, or even what you do as a parent for personal growth. Many times we get so caught up in what we have always done that we never really take a step back and look at the processes. In the business world, an organization is only as good as the processes used on a daily basis. In other words, we are only as good as the way we go about our business.
This is because these process we have in place are what determine the behaviors of the members of our organization. Take the time to assess your families processes. If you are not getting the outcome you want then you need to change the process. Start with little things to see if that changes behaviors. If the little changes don’t help go back to the drawing board and start a whole new process. These activities should also change based off the needs of our family and as our children grow. Great organizations grow and move with the market to meet their customer’s needs. We need to do the same with our families by simply taking the time to ask “How can we do this better?”
What type of leader am I?
I believe we were all born to be leaders because we are all born to be part of many organizations. Like it or not if you are in a family you are going to be called on to be a leader. That might be as a parent, a brother or sister, or as a grandparent. We are all going to have the opportunity to lead and serve those within our family organization. So what type of leader are you? There are many types of leaders out there and there is one type that is better than all the rest. That type is whatever is best for you.
The great thing about leadership is there is no set way it has to be done. There is a lot of information out there that will help you understand different leadership styles. The best one is the one that lets you be authentic and love those you are serving. Another question that always helps me understand what type of leader I want to be is simply, “How do I want to be remembered?” Then you work your way back from that question. What type of leader do you need to be to have your family remember you as that person?
Do you know what I see in you?
People tend to become what the most important people in their lives think they will become. This is something I read many years ago and it really had an impact on me. As leaders in our family take the time to tell others what you see in them. Not to be judgmental and tell them all the things they are doing wrong but to show them who you see they can become. I have said this before that the most impactful conversation I have every had with my wife is when she had this conversation with me.
One of the most important things we can share with the members of our family is that we believe in them and who they can become. Have the conversations with your children. When you show them what you see in them it will spark their greatness. It will show them they have someone in their corner that is pulling them to become the person they can. Help each member of your family believe in themselves by showing them that you believe in them.
As you start with these I hope it leads you to many more questions. Questions lead to conversation and good conversation leads to progress. Take the time to have these personal questions and get the family together to ask questions about your family organization. What a great way to have a family council and identify something that is not working and ask the question to the family of “How can we do this better?”. Our progress is only as good as the questions we ask. So ask the questions.